I started The Dysfunctional Delivery with a note from Nadine Daniels about her life being a source of entertainment for the universe. It is something akin to a cosmic practical joke. Unfortunately, I lived it this weekend and now have more sympathy for the character whose life I am constantly forcing to endure the most ridiculous situations.
I will start with Friday. My best friend drove up from Springfield, Missouri to have lunch with me. This went exceptionally well. We had a great time hanging out and talking. I should have ended my celebration with a sopapilla and a night at home watching horror movies.
Friday was not just my birthday, it was the first night of the Governor’s Cup Dart Tournament. This is a team oriented event for leagues and their players from all over the state of Missouri as well as players from a few surrounding states that also play darts in a Missouri league. Our arrival was great. Our room was wonderful, we rented a suite since it was my birthday weekend and the Columbia Dart Association team was made up of darters we see every week. We unpacked, got settled in, made the rounds to say hi to darters that were arriving that we see only a few times a year at tournaments, but darters are a family… no matter how diverse and wide spread.
I will point out that this is a steel-tip tournament, which is a dying sport in the US. It is being replaced by soft-tip. In the US, soft-tip offers more money at tournaments than steel. This is not the case outside the US.
Anyway, Friday was going well when all hell broke loose. I can’t actually say what happened, because I’m still not entirely sure. Somehow, I turned into a “bad guy” and a few ladies’ on my team got really pissed at me. I’m still not even sure I understand why. However, we worked it out as best we could and the weekend continued. We will discuss random acts of rage at a later time.
Saturday, I awoke with a migraine. Full-blown and kicking my ass, I popped some migraine meds, plastered on a smile, and made it through the events. I didn’t shoot great, but I didn’t shoot terrible, my shooting was mediocre and consistent. This did not help my team or my partners in the events. It was an early night. So, it sucked, but it wasn’t the end of the world.
Sunday was. I awoke without a headache. I actually felt fine. I was picking stuff up in our room (because while I realize the cleaning staff gets paid to clean up, I like to leave a tidy mess, a good tip, and a personal note), when I bent down, picked up an empty pizza box and pain shot from my rear end down to my feet. For several minutes, I couldn’t stand upright. I finally get myself standing and moving again, but that doesn’t help the pain. I make it downstairs to the dart hall, primarily because we have doctors, nurses, nurse practitioners, and chiropractors that all play darts and I have no idea what the hell has happened to my behind (my first thought was that I had somehow fractured my tailbone when I bent over, which is strange, but I didn’t have another option for the pain at that time). Thankfully, I didn’t fracture my tailbone, I pinched my sciatic nerve. Okay! I have some tramadol, I keep it for my migraines. I pop two, because one isn’t going to do it.
Neither does two. I shuffle back to my room. Our group has ordered sandwiches from Jimmy John’s Subs. I eat about 3/4 of my sub when I realize it feels odd to bite into my sandwich. I chew. That doesn’t feel strange. So I take another bite and that same weird sensation happens. I put the sandwich down, walk to the bathroom and the horror of the situation hits. One of my front teeth has broken. Not completely, just the back of it. However, when I touch it with my tongue, it moves forward. Biting into my sandwich is no longer feasible. I throw away the leftovers. Now, one of my nieces is starting dental school this year. She’s done tons of job shadowing and no matter how many doctors and nurses are downstairs, not a single one of them is a dentist, she’s the best I have. I call her into the bathroom.
Now, I have known for 20 years that my teeth are decalcifying. It’s a constant, irritating problem. Some of my teeth have holes that can’t be filled because the decalcification causes the filings to weaken and break or fall out in a short time. A couple of my teeth have actually been made worse by trying to fix them. I’ve actually started having some of them pulled, because they were just beyond saving. However, this is a front tooth. I try not to be vain, but I’m not keen on the idea of walking around missing a front tooth. But… my teeth aren’t just decalcifying where it can be seen, they are decalcifying under the gum line. This makes caps and crowns kind of iffy. The last dentist I saw told me I could spend the $20,000 to fix all my teeth, but in five years or less, most of it would have to be redone. I don’t really like those odds. My niece is fairly sure that if they attempt to cap or crown it, it will be like some of my other work and actually do more damage than good.
Great… Other options? Implants! I can have the tooth removed and get an implant. I’m allergic to metal. Yet, I do have one filing that is metal that has been in my mouth since I was fifteen (a few of my teeth actually grew in with holes in them, this filing is in one of them). So, maybe I can do an implant. My teeth aren’t strong enough for a partial.
I guess I will see what the day brings.